Aliens for Breakfast Read online

  Text copyright © 1988 by Jonathan Etra and Stephanie Spinner. Illustrations copyright © 1988 by Steve Björkman. All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. Published in the United States by Random House Children’s Books, a division of Random House, Inc., New York, and simultaneously in Canada by Random House of Canada Limited, Toronto.

  www.randomhouse.com/kids

  Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

  Etra, Jonathan. Aliens for breakfast / by Jonathan Etra and Stephanie Spinner.

  p. cm. — (A Stepping stone book)

  SUMMARY: Finding an intergalactic special agent in his cereal box, Richard joins in a fight to save Earth from the Dranes, one of whom is masquerading as a student in Richard’s class.

  eISBN: 978-0-307-80159-3

  [1. Extraterrestrial beings—Fiction. 2. Science fiction.] I. Spinner, Stephanie.

  II. Title. PZ7.E854A1 1988 Fic—dc19 88-6653

  RANDOM HOUSE and colophon are registered trademarks and A STEPPING STONE BOOK and colophon are trademarks of Random House, Inc.

  v3.1

  To Mom—J.E.

  To Calista—S.S.

  Contents

  Cover

  Title Page

  Copyright

  Dedication

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  About the Authors

  About the Illustrator

  1.

  “Mom, I hate these sneakers.” Richard Bickerstaff was getting dressed for school.

  “You picked them out yourself last week, sweetie,” his mother called from the kitchen.

  “Last week they were okay. Today I hate them.” Richard frowned at his feet. Why had he ever chosen these dumb black high-tops? He should have gotten red-leather running shoes like Dorfs. They were cool. But then, Dorf was cool. He had just moved here. He’d only been in Richard’s class for two days, but already the other kids were imitating him. They were copying his big smile, which showed off his perfect white teeth. And they were copying the way he dressed. On the first day he came to school, Dorf wore a red bowling shirt. It had his name, Dorf, spelled out on the pocket. The next day Richard’s best friend, Henry, wore a bowling shirt. It had “Sylvia” stitched on the pocket. Everyone thought it was pretty great anyway.

  Richard poked around in his closet, which was full of old Space Lords of Gygrax comics. He didn’t have a bowling shirt and he knew it. But he looked anyway.

  “Richard, finish dressing or you won’t have time for breakfast,” called his mother. “Hurry up. I have some new cereal for you to try.”

  Richard found a clean shirt and put it on. “I hate cereal,” he said as he came into the kitchen. He scowled at his cereal bowl. It was full of strange little brightly colored shapes. “And this stuff is looking at me!” he added. All the strange little shapes had tiny silver eyes.

  “It’s called Alien Crisp,” said his mother. She poured some milk into Richard’s bowl. “I thought you’d like it, since you’re such a sci-fi fan.”

  The little shapes seemed to grow as the milk touched them. Then everything in the bowl heaved and sighed.

  Richard put down his spoon. “Mom, where did you find this stuff? It’s alive!”

  “Richard, your imagination is getting out of hand,” said his mother. “It’s a free sample. I found it in the mailbox.”

  “But it’s moving!”

  “The milk is making it move.”

  “The milk is standing still. The cereal is moving.”

  “Well, wait until it stops moving. Then eat it,” said Mrs. Bickerstaff. “I have to get ready for work.” Mrs. Bickerstaff was a lawyer. She almost never minded arguing. Except when she was in a hurry. Like now.

  “I don’t think it’s cereal,” muttered Richard as she hurried out of the kitchen. He picked up the cereal box. “Alien Crisp” it said on the front. “Crunchy, Munchy Aliens in a Box! Packed on the Planet Ganoob and Rushed Straight to You!”

  Richard eyed his bowl. Everything in it had stopped moving. Then the milk gave a tiny splash. A round pink thing the color of chewed bubblegum started to climb up the side of the bowl. Amazed, Richard touched it with his spoon.

  “Stop that!” The words came directly into Richard’s head. He put his spoon down very quickly. Then he took off his glasses and wiped them on his shirt sleeve. But when he put them back on, the thing was still there.

  “What do you think you’re doing?” asked the voice.

  “Uh, eating breakfast,” answered Richard. Was a piece of cereal really talking to him?

  It was. “I could use some breakfast myself,” it said. It crawled out of the bowl and dropped onto the table. “The trip really took it out of me.”

  Richard finally found his voice. “Who are you?” he asked.

  “Aric. Commander of the Interspace Brigade. Our goal: to wipe out cosmic troublemakers. Our record: ninety-eight percent success.”

  “You’re an alien?” squeaked Richard. All those books he’d read about kids meeting aliens. And now it looked like it was happening to him. Him! Richard Bickerstaff!

  “I am a Ganoobian,” said Aric. “You are the alien.”

  I’ve got to be dreaming, thought Richard. He sometimes had very exciting dreams about space travel and large but friendly creatures from other planets who made him their leader.

  “Well, come on! Do not just sit there!” said Aric. His voice was awfully loud for such a little thing. It boomed inside Richard’s head. “Let us get going—I am busy. I have six other planets to save. Move it or lose it! Hup-hup-hup!”

  “Wait a minute,” said Richard. “Where are we going? Who are we fighting? What about school? I’m going to be late!”

  “Hey—it is your planet,” said Aric. “And you have been chosen to help me save it. But if you do not mind the Dranes taking over, hunky-dory.” He started to climb back into Richard’s cereal bowl.

  “Who are the Dranes?” Richard wondered if they were tiny and pink, like Aric.

  “Space trash,” said Aric. “Mean. Very mean. When the Dranes see a planet they like, they move in. Before the natives know it, their minds are mush. And the Dranes are in control. Forever!”

  “And these, uh, Dranes. They’re here?” asked Richard.

  “Yes, they are here. Or to be precise, one is here. But one is more than enough. Dranes divide every four days. In a few weeks Earth will be knee-deep in them. Not a pretty sight.”

  “What does this Drane look like?” asked Richard.

  “Well, Dranes can look like anything they want to. The one here has blond hair, blue eyes, and a smile no one can resist. He is in your class. He just showed up two days ago.”

  “Dorf? Dorf is an alien?” Richard was so excited he jumped out of his chair. He couldn’t wait to tell Henry.

  “My job is to get rid of the Drane before he divides,” said Aric. Then, for a moment, he looked a little confused. “You have suitable weapons, of course.”

  “Weapons? All I’ve got is a water gun!” Somehow Richard knew that wouldn’t be enough to stop a Drane.

  Aric sat down on the table. “Maybe it is because I am not used to being soaked in milk,” he said. “But I cannot remember—”

  “You can’t remember what?” asked Richard.

  “The weapon to use against the Drane.” Aric looked confused again.

  “You mean you didn’t bring weapons with you on your spaceship?”

  “I have no ship,” said the little alien.

  “Then how did you get here?”

  “I was freez
e-dried and beamed from Ganoob in a cereal box. Fast and cheap,” said Aric.

  “Well, have them beam the right weapons down,” said Richard.

  “No, no—you do not understand,” said Aric. “The weapon is here, on your planet. That is why I did not bring it. It is something found in many Earthling homes. Only, now—” He scratched his little pink head. “I cannot remember what it is!”

  “Richard!” called Mrs. Bickerstaff. “School bus is here.”

  Richard scooped up his books and his lunchbox. “Look,” he said: “I’m just a kid. And I have to go to school. You’re the space warrior. You figure out what to do.”

  To Richard’s surprise, Aric jumped onto his shoulder. “I am coming with you,” he said. “Perhaps I will regain my memory when I see the Drane. Let us go forth!”

  Richard plucked Aric off his shoulder. He tucked him gently into his shirt pocket. “ ’Bye, Mom,” he called. “I’m off to save the world.”

  “Have fun, sweetie,” answered Mrs. Bickerstaff.

  2.

  Richard slid into his seat just as math was starting. He was under strict orders from Aric to act normal. “Do not let anyone know about me,” he had told Richard on the way to school. “If the Drane finds out I am here, you can kiss this planet good-bye.” So now Richard couldn’t stare at Dorf, even though he wanted to. Instead he had to pretend that the only thing on his mind was the question Mrs. Marks was asking.

  As usual, it was a hard one.

  “Who knows how many ways we can make change for a dollar?” she asked. She looked around the room slowly. Then she stared straight at Richard. His heart sank. “Richard?” she asked.

  Richard knew you could get four quarters or ten dimes or a hundred pennies from a dollar. But that was too easy. This was a trick question with a trick answer. Only he didn’t know the answer.

  “Any ideas, Richard?” asked Mrs. Marks.

  “Four?”

  “Only four?”

  “Five,” he said quickly. He would have to bluff.

  “Who thinks there are more?” asked Mrs. Marks.

  “There must be at least ten,” called Henry. He was good at trick questions. “What about a mixture of nickels, dimes, and pennies? Or nickels, quarters, and half-dollars?”

  Half-dollars! thought Richard. I forgot those.

  Then Dorf raised his hand. He had a big smile on his face. It showed off his perfect white teeth.

  “Yes, Dorf?” said Mrs. Marks.

  “There are two hundred ninety-two ways to change a dollar bill,” said Dorf.

  All the kids in the class stared at Dorf. How had he come up with that number?

  “Good guess!” exclaimed Mrs. Marks.

  “It’s not a guess,” said Dorf. “I figured it out last summer. On my computer.”

  “Well, you’re very clever indeed,” said Mrs. Marks. “Because that is the right answer. Can anyone explain why?” Her eyes moved up and down the rows. Richard tried to look invisible.

  “You have pennies, nickels, dimes, quarters, and half-dollars,” continued Dorf. “One hundred thirty-six coins in all. But you can mix them in all kinds of ways. Like five pennies, two dimes, five nickels, and a half-dollar. Or forty-five pennies, a nickel, and two quarters. There are hundreds of ways to do it. Two hundred ninety-two ways, to be exact,” he finished smoothly.

  Mrs. Marks didn’t smile a lot. But she smiled now. And everyone in the class nodded, as if Dorf had just said something important and wonderful.

  “He has begun to control their minds,” said Aric. Richard jumped. For a moment he had forgotten about the alien in his pocket. Now he felt a thrill of alarm at Aric’s words. What should he do?

  “I told you before,” said Aric’s voice. “Just act normal. Do you understand?”

  “Yes,” said Richard silently, sensing that Aric could hear his thoughts. He felt hot and nervous. But at least math was over. He walked over to Henry’s seat with his lunch box. They always traded sandwiches after math. Richard’s mother made him tuna on whole wheat, which he hated. Henry’s mother made him peanut butter and jelly, which he hated. So they traded. But when Richard got to Henry, Henry was already eating a sandwich. It looked like tuna fish. Dorf was sitting next to Henry. He was eating a sandwich, too. It looked like peanut butter and jelly.

  “Hey!” said Richard. “Don’t you want to trade?”

  “Already have,” said Henry, with his mouth full. “I traded with Dorf.” His eyes, when he turned to Richard, looked funny. Almost as if they weren’t focused right.

  “But we always trade,” said Richard.

  “Here, Richard. Have half of mine,” said Dorf. He offered his peanut butter and jelly with a smile.

  “Do not look at his teeth.” Aric’s voice popped into Richard’s mind. “They send out dangerous Drane rays that will bring you under his control. Look only into his eyes. They cannot harm you.”

  Richard took a deep breath and turned to Henry. “I hate tuna fish,” he said. “And we always trade. How could you give my sandwich away?”

  “It’s not your sandwich. Anyway, Dorf got to me first,” said Henry.

  Richard sputtered with anger. “He’s a—” Before he could say “Drane monster,” Henry broke in.

  “He’s a great guy,” said Henry. His mouth was still full of tuna fish. “He’s got his own VCR and all the Mad Max tapes. And he’s going to let me watch them on Saturday.”

  “Why don’t you come too?” said Dorf. “A whole bunch of kids from the class are coming. It’ll be fun.”

  “I hate Mad Max!” said Richard, though this wasn’t true. Then he saw that Henry was staring straight at Dorf. Right at Dorf’s perfect smile. “And besides, I’m already busy,” he finished weakly.

  Then he sat down at his desk and looked blankly at his tuna sandwich. Earth is in BIG trouble, thought Richard Bickerstaff.

  3.

  All day Richard kept waiting for Aric to remember what the secret weapon was. But Aric didn’t remember. Instead, he complained. He whined about having to stay in Richard’s pocket. He made rude remarks about the classes he had to sit through. The only time he stopped complaining was during gym. Then he sat in the pocket of Richard’s shorts and didn’t make a sound. After gym he confessed that the smell of the basketball reminded him of Ingbar, his girlfriend on Ganoob.

  But at last the school day was almost over. Only art was left—Richard’s favorite. He had been working for weeks on a drawing of the starship Enterprise. Now it was nearly finished. He settled down and got to work. Using a silver crayon, he drew in one last fin on the ship’s side. “Isn’t this great?” he asked Aric silently. Now that he knew he could send thoughts to the little alien, he was beginning to like it.

  “Primitive,” answered Aric. “Besides, interspace beaming is much cheaper.”

  “But what if you don’t know exactly where you’re going? Captain Kirk never has a destination. He spends his time on the Enterprise exploring space. Looking for strange new worlds.”

  “Get real. We have enough problems with the worlds we know already. Thanks to our friends the Dranes. In case you had forgotten.”

  Richard threw down his crayon. “How could I forget?” he said out loud. Too late, he remembered about sending the thought silently. What if someone in class heard him talking to himself? They would think he was crazy.

  But no one even looked at him. His whole class was watching in silence as Dorf worked on his art project. Richard wondered why everyone was so impressed. After all, it was only a little white paper pyramid.

  Mrs. Logan walked over to Dorf’s desk. Dorf smiled one of his big smiles up at her. Her eyes got a little funny and glassy as she smiled back. “How beautiful!” she said to Dorf. “So three-dimensional!”

  Henry was sitting next to Dorf. He stared at Dorf’s pyramid for a long time. Then he stared at his own crayon drawing of two dinosaurs. Then he looked back at Dorf’s pyramid again.

  “Mrs. Logan, can I make something new?” h
e asked.

  “What would you like to make, Henry?” asked Mrs. Logan.

  “Uh, something three-dimensional. Like Dorf.”

  “What a nice idea!” said Mrs. Logan. “Of course! Go ahead.”

  Then Celia raised her hand. She was drawing a picture of dancing jellybeans. “Me, too,” she said.

  “Me, too,” said Jennifer, Ruth, Philip, George, Leroy, Fawn, Dawn, Sean, and Tristram. Mrs. Logan looked pleased.

  “If you’d all like to try something new, go right ahead,” she said. The whole class got up. They walked to the supply table and took what was left of the white paper. Then they walked back to their seats and began making little white pyramids. They look like a bunch of robots, thought Richard.

  Mrs. Logan came over to him. “Is something wrong?” she asked. “Don’t you want to try something new too?”

  “Not really,” said Richard. “I haven’t finished my starship yet.”

  Suddenly Mrs. Logan leaned closer. “What’s that on your hand?” she asked. “Are you bleeding?”

  Richard looked at his fingers. Yikes! The tips were bright red. Blood was oozing out from under his fingernails.

  Richard grabbed his hand. “How did this happen? I didn’t cut myself. I’m sure of it.” Out of the corner of his eye he saw Dorf smile. Why?

  “Do not look at his teeth,” Aric told him. “Get out of class.”

  “You’d better go to the nurse,” said Mrs. Logan. “She’ll take care of you.”

  Richard stood, holding his hand up stiffly. Henry tore his eyes away from his pyramid. “Does it hurt?” he asked.

  “Naw,” said Richard, as if it were no big deal. The truth was, it didn’t hurt. But it scared him. He knew he hadn’t cut himself. Or had he?

  “You did not,” Aric told him on the way to the nurse’s office. “I am sorry to have to break this to you. Dorf knows you are resisting him. So he is pulling a cheap Drane trick. He is rearranging your molecules. You are melting.”

  Richard stopped in his tracks. “Melting!”

  “Well, dissolving is more like it,” said Aric. “Your molecules are drifting apart. Slowly, of course.”